How not to day tour with a toddler


We did a little day tour to Brighton over the Christmas break and although it was very pretty and we all had a great day I thought I'd share my tips on 'how not to day tour with a toddler' based on our fabulous little day trip:

  • Get your toddler to wake at 4.30 am (Ok clearly we did not do this by choice. This is holy as hell early even for him).
  • No problemo. Get your toddler to sleep in the car on the way. But then make sure he wakes up after 20 minutes. (F. Itโ€™s going to be a long day. Oh and no, we did not wake him up, again, but just rolling with the punches at this stage.)
  • Ensure toddler is grumpy when he wakes.
  • Now, mummy should go ahead and buy every toy under the sun in a desperate attempt to keep the kid happy and entertained (massive cheat method โ€“ sure to win some parent of the year awards woo).
  • Walk around looking for restaurants while on the phone trying to find a restaurant that will take 5 people with a kid. (Why do I never listen to my own advice and actually get organised?!)
  • End up at Pizza Express.
  • Give in to the truth that youโ€™ve always known but have been denying for the last 18 months. Pizza Express is now your life. And will be for probably the next 15 years.  
  • Stare in awe at the amazeballs super parents at the table next to you dealing with four kids under four, the youngest being twins of 6 months while they sit and eat a fine old meal while having a chat with a glass of wine.
  • Do tend to a bit of shop-hopping on the way back to the car and make the most wonderful purchase of a beautiful new winter coat (inspired most likely by the two glasses of wine consumed at Pizza Express). 
  • Finish the day being more tired than your kid. (Honestly, how does he not get tired?)
  • Sit back and realise through all the chaos he's a bloody little legend, cranky pants and all.